The Time I Was Offered A "Michael Jackson Handshake"- A Lesson In Leadership Presence

Leadership Presence isn't a title it's how you show up when it counts.

A few years ago, I was visiting the Wheatstone Project, an LNG plant nestled deep in the red dust of the Pilbara, WA.

It was a tense time. We were in the middle of a complex enterprise agreement negotiation and had doubled the workforce overnight with contractors, trying to pre-empt industrial action.

As Head of HR for Greyhound Australia, I was on-site to meet some of the new bus drivers. Dressed in high-vis and a red Greyhound cap, I looked just like any other team member.

I sat down at a table with a few of the drivers when a new recruit approached. I reached out my hand to introduce myself.

And that’s when it happened.

Instead of returning the handshake, he grabbed his crotch, moved it up and down three times, then extended his hand.

I was stunned. The other drivers were too.

In that split second, I accessed something I teach leaders to develop—a strong Inner Observer. It was like I was watching from the rooftop, calmly seeing the scene unfold. And I said, with total composure:

“I guess now would be a bad time for you to find out I’m the General Manager of HR for Greyhound.”

His jaw dropped. He muttered, “My mum wouldn’t be very happy with me right now.” I replied, “It’s not your mum you need to be worried about.”

Right then, my phone rang. It was the CEO. I stepped out to take the call. When I returned, the driver had vanished.

On a site with 5,000 people, it took until the next day after his shift to bring him in for a conversation. I asked what he was thinking. His behaviour wasn’t aligned to our values, so I made the decision: he would not be returning to work.

The following day, I spoke with the rest of the drivers and made it clear—this behaviour had no place in our culture.

As a leader you are often in high stakes and high visibility moments and how you respond defines your leadership brand. Below are five lessons that are useful to consider in developing your leadership presence.

Five Lessons in Leadership Presence

1. Presence is energy, not ego. Leadership presence isn’t about status, it’s about the frequency you hold. Calm is a power move. Embody it.
2. Culture is defined by what you tolerate. In that moment, I wasn’t just correcting behaviour, I was shaping the cultural line in the sand. Leaders are culture.
3. Clarity over chaos. Reacting would’ve added heat. Responding added clarity. Emotional regulation is a performance enhancer.
4. The Inner Observer is your superpower. Zooming out and seeing yourself in the scene allows you to lead from intention, not reactioni. It’s a skill—and it’s magnetic.
5. People are always watching. Whether you’re in a suit or high-vis, your actions are setting the standard. Presence means modelling what’s right, even when no one’s formally “watching.”

Presence isn’t a performance. It’s a practice. Leadership is less about having the right words and more about being the right presence, especially when no one sees you coming.

Want to Lead with More Presence, Power and Poise?

If you or your team are ready to sharpen your leadership presence and master the art of emotional regulation, especially in high-stakes moments, reach out to Simone at [email protected].

Her signature workshop blends neuroscience, real-world leadership, and practical tools to help leaders respond with intention instead of reacting on autopilot. These science-backed techniques are proven to boost clarity, influence, and confidence when it matters most.

This isn’t just another workshop. It’s the #1 skill that shapes your leadership impact.

Your presence is your power. Let’s elevate it.